Responding to a child’s behaviour

This article is based on the video on responding to a child’s behaviour. This is part of a behaviour management workshop organised by Nayi Disha with Dr Gouri Reddy, Child Psychologist.

In this video, Dr Gouri talks about the importance of parents’ response to a child’s behaviour. It is important to set clear expectations from the child, positively reinforce the child’s efforts and remain consistent with the way you respond to the child’s behaviour. 

A behaviour is a reaction of the child to his environment or situations that they encounter. 

Children with autism may exhibit behaviours that may be a cause for concern, as it may often lead to the child having huge outbursts which may be difficult to control. Sometimes, this can also lead to the child being a danger to self or the people around him.

It is therefore important to have a behaviour management plan to support the child at home and outside settings.

Before we try to modify the child’s behaviour, it is important to first understand the underlying cause of the behaviour. There may be several factors leading to the behaviour, such as:

1. Lack of communication: Children with autism have delayed communication. This can often lead to the child having an outburst like screaming instead of communicating their needs or discomfort. Parents should therefore work on the child’s communication skills to help the child communicate their needs instead of having a tantrum.  
2. Sensory sensitivities: A heightened response to stimulus can often lead to children with autism having difficulty settling in a new environment. This can often lead to the child engaging in concerning behaviour.
3. Transition from routine: A routine gives a child with autism comfort and structure that they enjoy. Any unexpected transition can lead to anxiety and frustration leading to behavioural outbursts.

Therefore it is extremely essential to identify the possible triggers that are causing the said behaviour. Methods can then be used to address them with patience, encouragement and consistency.

Dr. Gouri brings to fore the importance of using the following strategies to support the child’s behaviours effectively.

1. Praise and positive reinforcement

• Acknowledge the child’s efforts when they follow rules or instructions in home or outside settings. For instance, when the child is taken for shopping and the child follows the rules set by the parent, it is important to immediately recognise the child’s efforts and praise him for their efforts. 
• Dr. Reddy reiterates this by giving an example of a child helping out at home, by offering water to their father. Here, the child should be praised immediately. This helps the child understand what is expected of them. 
• Offer positive reinforcement in the form of the child’s favourite toy or a preferred activity. It is important to keep in mind the child’s choices. For example, after a shopping trip, where the child follows the parents’ instructions, the child can be offered an ice cream or can be taken on a drive as per their preferences. 
• It is important to remember to follow through on what has been promised to the child.

2. Communicate clearly 

• While offering praise and encouragement to the child, make sure the child understands which behaviour is being reinforced. 
• For instance, if the child sits through a haircut without hitting or pushing the people around him, praise the child by saying “You did a good job keeping your hands to yourself” instead of simply saying “Good job”. 
• This will help the child understand the expectations and motivate him to follow.
• Similarly, if the child offers water to his parents, a more suitable response would be “Thank you for bringing me water” instead of just thanking him. 
• If an undesirable behaviour is shown by the child like snatching or grabbing another child’s toy or things from a public place, the parents’ response should convey what is expected of the child instead of merely saying ‘no’.
• This ensures that the child has a clear understanding of what he can and cannot do in a given situation. 
• For children who may not understand spoken instructions clearly, visual aids can be used to demonstrate the expected behaviour, to avoid children being overwhelmed with too much information.

3. Be consistent

• It is important to remember that parents need to be consistent and follow through while supporting their children. 
• Being consistent helps the child understand consequences of their action. 
• As children with autism thrive on predictability, following what was promised helps children follow instructions with ease. For example, the child is expected  to sit quietly for 5 minutes, after which the child has been promised that they can have a short walk or a run. It is crucial that this promise is kept and the child is allowed to get up after the specified time. 
• This will not only ensure the child follows the instruction but also motivates him to follow in future as well.
• Not doing so might result in the child being frustrated or upset or behaviours that were to be avoided in the first place.
• It is also important that all caregivers are on the same page while interacting with the child.

The different strategies shared by Dr. Gouri in the parent workshop can be used to support and manage behaviours, effectively.

The workshop videos have been split into multiple parts. You can check out the video on what is behaviour? What is ABC Method for Behaviour Management, Managing a child’s behaviour outside the home environment,  Positive and negative reinforcement and Parent Q and A.

You may download this template of the Behaviour management ABC chart here, and use it to address your child’s behaviour differences in a context-dependent fashion.

If you have questions about Autism, Down Syndrome, ADHD, or other Intellectual Disabilities, or have concerns about developmental delays in a child, the Nayi Disha team is here to help. For any questions or queries, please contact our FREE Helpline at 844-844-8996. You can call or what’s app us. Our counselors speak different languages including English, Hindi, Malayalam, Gujarati, Marathi, Telugu, and Bengali.

DISCLAIMER: Please note that this guide is for information purposes only. Please consult a qualified health practitioner for proper management.